Stop blaming others and accept responsibility (1)

2018-05-11
Genesis 3:12 NIV

The story of Adam and Eve’s failure teaches us two important lessons about God: (1) He won’t accept your excuses. (2) He won’t let you blame other people. He insists that you take responsibility for yourself. And until you do, He can’t bless you like He desires. That means you must make a choice to stop living in the dumpster of past mistakes – your own, and other people’s. You must focus on where you’re going and what you’d like to see happen, rather than having your eyes glued to the rearview mirror, looking back at what was done and who did it. It’s time to take back your power! How? (a) Declare “time-out” when it comes to blaming. (b) Define what success would look like for you and specify what you want to see happen. (c) Delegate “who’ll do what” in order to make it happen, and reward the people who help you toward a brighter future. (d) Realize that deliverable goals are goals that are attainable. Relationships in trouble desperately need good news, so develop some achievable goals that give everyone something to celebrate. It doesn’t have to be the ultimate goals that’ll win the war, but small successes that indicate you’re winning some battles. This game plan gives power back to the individual who needs to see progress. It distracts you from blame-fixing and gives you guidelines for what’s productive. It takes the power away from dwelling in the past, where none of us has the ability to undo what was done no matter who is to blame. And it’s a constructive effort, as opposed to one that’s destructive.

Soul food: Deut 22-24; Mark 7:24-37; Ps 44:1-8; Prov 12:7-9

Be careful whom you confide in

2017-08-04
Proverbs 11:13 NLT

If you need help with a problem in your personal life, your family, or your career, keep the following things in mind: (1) Bad news is often remembered longer than good news. Long after you have resolved the issue and moved on with your life, the wrong people will continue to focus on it and talk about it. That’s why God’s Word says, “Those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence.” (2) Be careful who advises you. “The thoughts of the righteous are right, but the counsels of the wicked are deceitful” (Proverbs 12:5 NKJV). Be sure you reach for the right person. There are many sources of wisdom in this world, “but the wisdom that is from above is… pure… peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and… hypocrisy” (Jas 3:17 NKJV). Note the words, “the wisdom that is from above.” Confide only in a counsellor who walks according to the principles of God’s Word. (3) Make sure the person you trust isn’t confiding in others you wouldn’t trust. They say you can tell a man by the company he keeps. And it’s true! The Bible says, “Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly” (Ps 1:1 NKJV). (4) “Problem talk” can portray you as a victim instead of an overcomer. Nobody wants to back a loser. When Job lost everything, almost everybody avoided him. It was only after God doubled Job’s blessings that they returned to participate in his life and bring him gifts. It’s always wise to control your mouth, your thoughts, and your focus. Remember, silence can never be misquoted.

Soul food: 1 Chr 3:1-4:23; Mark 2:1-12; Ps 119:1-8; Prov 20:15-18