2025-10-14
Matthew 16:18 KJV
Author Sherry Surratt notes that when Jesus promised to build His church, “[he] wasn’t just talking about the bricks or wood that form a… building, but he was talking about building his church of… ordinary, human people who are imperfect… broken and [who] bring their messy lives… with them every time they walk through the door. This is what Christ died for… He died for people – for his church… a group of people, led by people, and not a single one of us is perfect. We’re a broken bunch who hopefully recognizes our brokenness and acknowledges that Jesus is the only fix…
No matter how long we’ve been in the church, we never reach perfection… we’ll have to work at it every day. We’ll come face-to-face with our human side every morning when we wake up, and… when we do, we’ll bump up against each other and we’ll get hurt. Our natural tendency is to steer clear of what hurts us… So when we encounter gossip aimed at us or witness hatred or hypocrisy in our fellow churchgoers or even our pastors, it’s natural to think about walking away. But to do this is to separate ourselves from something that God built for us to use for our good…
The Bible never says other people aren’t going to wound [us]… What [it] does teach… is that it doesn’t help to just sit in hurt and feel sorry for [ourselves] (See Matthew 5:24). God’s Word warns [us] not to let bitterness set in (See Hebrews 12:15). This has nothing to do with pretending something didn’t happen. It has everything to do with being honest… admitting when our spirit is crushed and leaving revenge in the hands of God.”
Soul food: 2 Pet 1-3; John 4:27-38; Ps 87; Prov 24:1-4
2025-10-13
Matthew 16:18 KJV
Being hurt by another Christian can be devastating, but the church is filled with imperfect people who do things they shouldn’t. As C. S. Lewis said, “God works on us in all sorts of ways… above all he works on us through each other.” So before you give up and walk away, consider these suggestions:
(1) Admit how much it hurt, and start to cope with it. Running away doesn’t achieve this. Humbly approach the person who hurt you, motivated to reconcile. Discuss your pain with the purpose of releasing it and moving on.
(2) Ask, “What’s my role in this?” If it had nothing to do with you, as in the case of a trusted leader who has fallen morally or legally, ask yourself if you put idealistic expectations on their humanness. Did you think they were perfect? Now that you realize they’re not, can you forgive them?
(3) Ask God what to do next. He knows the motives in the hearts of the people involved. Give Him time to answer.
(4) “Guard your heart… for it determines the course of your life” (Proverbs 4:23 NLT). Choose to follow God, even when your heart breaks. He alone can decide motives and intents, and He is just and reasonable. But many times, our faithfulness must come first before His blessings flow.
(5) If you still feel you must leave, promise yourself and God that you will leave well. Refuse to say anything bad. Don’t leave mad, and admit the good, no matter how small. Most important of all, don’t quit. God is good, His church is good, and people are flawed. Locate another house of worship, and commit to it with an open heart.
Soul food: 2 Sam 22:31-24:25; John 4:13-26; Ps 32; Prov 23:29-35
2025-10-12
Romans 12:18 NKJV
At times it’s impossible to be at peace with certain people. Recognizing this reality, the apostle Paul, in essence, said, “Do all that you can to try and make it happen.” Besides the covenant relationship you have with your husband or wife and your responsibility for your children, if you’re wise, you will prayerfully evaluate your other relationships and know how much time you should invest in them.
For example: If you have a close relative who is always argumentative or negative, don’t put yourself in a position where you have to interact with them on a regular basis. Only holidays together may be enough! The same is true for friends. Those who gossip, condemn others, compete with you, or engage in cutting remarks should rarely find you available – unless the Lord impresses you to spend some time with them to impart His Word.
You are not commanded to spend time with people who disturb your peace. Solomon said, “Don’t… associate with hot-tempered people” (Proverbs 22:24 NLT). Paul warned, “Watch out for people who cause divisions… Stay away from them” (Romans 16:17 NLT).
When you’re in the company of a stress-producing person, ask yourself these questions: “Will this situation grow patience within me if I endure it rather than leave? Why do this person’s actions stress me out? Is it because they are reflecting my own behaviour? Why am I continuing to interact with them?” Prayer: “Father, I need you to help me discern when and how to be with stress-producing people so that your love continually shines through me.”
Soul food: Exo 34:29-35; Mark 9:2-27; 2 Cor 3:7-18
2025-10-11
Ephesians 4:15 NIV
Virginia Satir, a founder of family systems therapy, determined that most families have five styles of communication.
(1) Some members are placaters. They go along to get along, and reduce stress by saying what others want to hear that makes them less upset.
(2) Others are blamers: finger-pointers, nitpickers, spinners of exquisite theories, eager to prove that they’re right and you’re wrong. And by accepting the blame, you vindicate and empower them.
(3) Satir describes other family members as super-reasonable. Their motto is, “Always agree with what other people say and conceal your real feelings.” It’s how they prevent getting hurt. They talk from their head and not their heart, redirecting the conversation toward things that are “safe.”
(4) Other family members opt for irrelevance, deflecting the conversation away from uncomfortable and potentially threatening topics. They talk only about what’s unrelated to whatever is going on.
(5) The final communication style is congruous or consistent. Congruous people tell it like it is. No disguising feelings, no double-talk, and no pretending. If they’re angry, they own their anger, they say they’re angry, and they may even look angry. They’re straight shooters. They have credibility; you can understand and believe them. No topics have to be dodged, and no questions avoided. Anything and everything can be discussed, and everyone’s opinion is respected.
Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “Nothing astonishes men [and women] so much as common sense and plain dealing.” And it’s a scriptural, truth-based communication style that works.
Soul food: 2 Sam 20:1-22:30; John 4:1-12; Ps 100; Prov 23:22-28
2025-10-10
Hebrews 4:16 NLT
During World War II, Corrie ten Boom and her Dutch family hid many Jews from the Nazis. Eventually, she was caught and put in a concentration camp where she saw all sorts of atrocities, including the death of her father and sister. Then she was accidentally released. She never became bitter. She even forgave the man who killed her relatives.
Someone asked her how she could endure those dark days and remain loving, forgiving, and kind. She answered with a story of how, when she was a little girl, her father would take her on train rides all over Europe. He would always purchase her ticket several weeks ahead of time, but he would never let her have it until they were boarding. That’s because she was a little girl, and he didn’t want her to lose it or leave it at home. But whenever her father saw the headlights of the train approaching the station, he would give her the ticket, and they would step on board together.
Corrie said, “The reason you can’t fathom how I could forgive the person who killed my family, how I could not be filled with bitterness… is because just like my father and our train tickets, God doesn’t give us the grace we need until we’re about to step on board. But if you ever go through something like I went through, I can assure you God’s grace will be there to help you make it through the dark valleys and still keep your head held high and your heart filled with love.”
Soul food: 2 Sam 17:14-19:43; John 3:22-36; Ps 89:38-52; Prov 23:19-21
2025-10-09
Colossians 2:10 NKJV
One Christian author writes: “What if everywhere you went, you ran into someone you didn’t like? You attend a party and have to endure her conversation and constant opinions. You go to church, and she’s sitting right beside you… she is at the dinner table… she’s everywhere! That sounds pretty awful, but this is the exact situation you’re in if you don’t like yourself, because you are everywhere you go. You can’t get away from yourself, even for a second, so you’re in for a sad life if you dread your own company.
Even though… it makes no sense to live… this way… most people don’t like themselves. They may not even realize it, but some genuine soul-searching reveals the sad fact that they have rejected themselves, and in some cases, even hate themselves… I’m amazed at how few are truly at peace with themselves. Instead, they’ve declared war on themselves. God wants you to love yourself, not in some wrong selfish or prideful way, but in a healthy way that truly understands how special you are to Him. As you begin to see yourself as God sees you, not only will you love yourself, but you’ll have the confidence and faith to be a powerful force for good in the world.”
Somebody said just because nobody has been fortunate enough to realize what a gold mine you are doesn’t mean you shine any less. Just because nobody has been smart enough to figure out that you can’t be topped doesn’t stop you from being the best. Just because nobody has come along to share your life doesn’t mean that day isn’t coming… Keep shining, keep running, keep hoping, keep praying… keep being exactly who you are.
Soul food: 2 Sam 14:21-17:13; John 3:1-21; Ps 89:15-37; Prov 23:15-18
