2021-07-05
Ecclesiastes 10:12 NIV
Are you are easily hurt? Do you hurt other people without intending to? Three things cause that: (1) We speak out of our own hurt. German poet Hermann Hesse wrote: “If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn’t part of ourselves doesn’t disturb us.” It helps to remember that people often lash out in response to what’s happening inside themselves.
(2) When we’re hurting, we get touchy. Let’s say you ignore a splinter in your finger, and it gets infected. Someone brushes up against it, and you howl with pain, “You hurt me!” However, the real problem is the splinter you neglected to address. Hurting people overreact, over exaggerate, and overprotect. They also over-influence. Counselors who deal with couples in crisis say that emotionally one spouse “throws up,” and the other “cleans up.” Usually the one with the most pain does the most damage.
(3) Getting over our hurt takes time. Quick fixes don’t work. The kindest thing you can do when someone’s hurting is to show them you care. And if they’re willing, to help them work through their issues and get beyond the pain. Good things can come from bad situations.
A cleaning company working on a sewer line under a city street found sixty-one diamond rings, numerous vintage coins, and silverware. It was an unpleasant job – but the workers were allowed to keep the valuables they found. You may have to deal with some pretty nasty stuff, but in the process, you may discover some treasures you didn’t know existed, and after all your hard work, end up with a great relationship.
Soul food: Jer 41-44; Luke 5:1-11; Ps 102:18-28; Prov 15:4-7
2021-07-04
Colossians 4:6 NLT
If you habitually put your foot in your mouth, there’s a scriptural remedy. “Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone” (v. 6 NLT). Notice this: To speak effectively requires you to be “gracious” in your dealings with others. And while honesty is always the best policy, it’s not a license to say whatever you want.
One of the most important skills you can develop is the ability to deal with others tactfully and with sensitivity when you find yourself in a difficult situation. You would think exhibiting graciousness would come easily to those who claim to be filled with the Spirit of God, but the evidence shows otherwise. We tend to perpetuate the communication style of the family we grew up in. You say, “But sometimes you need to be brutally honest!”
Extending grace and being truthful are not mutually exclusive. You can learn to tell the truth tactfully. The Bible says, “For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ” (John 1:17 NIV). Jesus never allowed courtesy and kindness to prevent Him from telling the truth, but He never did it in a mean-spirited way. Nor should you. Sometimes we claim to be “speaking the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15), when the truth is, that anger, frustration, disappointment, and retaliation are what’s truly in our hearts.
What’s the remedy? Before you speak, take a moment to review the words in your mind, and try to evaluate their impact. Then choose to yield to the Holy Spirit’s leading. Doing that will help you develop the emotional discipline necessary for stifling tactless remarks.
Soul food: Isa 53:2-12; Acts 8:26-40
2021-07-03
Matthew 7:25 NKJV
Did you know that before it snows, certain fir trees retract their branches so that the weight of the snow they’ll have to bear will be reduced? This withdrawal response is programmed into their branches. God has enabled these trees to anticipate the problem before it occurs, thereby reducing the risk that they will break in a storm. And you need to do the same thing in your marriage. You can’t avoid problems and crises, but you can prepare for their arrival. Most of the stress points in our families are common, and therefore predictable.
Christian psychologist, Doctor James Dobson writes: “One of my good friends spent a considerable amount of time with his wife, preparing for the moment when their grown kids would move out of the house. They talked often about the empty nest, and discussed ways their friends had coped with it. They read books about that phase of life, and applied what they had heard to themselves. As a result, their transition to the empty nest was smooth. Into every marriage, a little snow will fall. Blizzards will blow, and storms will howl. But an effort to anticipate these times will help you and your mate stand up under the weight of the winter storm.”
Here are three ways in which you can be ready: (1) Sharing goals beyond parenting to which you’re both committed. (2) Sharing feelings and needs, and having them validated. (3) Sharing in prayer together each day. Did you know that 90 percent of all Christian couples don’t pray together? Be sure and make it your goal to be part of the 10 percent who do.
Soul food: Jer 36:27-40:16; Luke 4:31-44; Ps 102:12-17; Prov 15:3
2021-07-02
John 15:4 NKJV
A branch doesn’t bear fruit by trying, working, or straining. It bears fruit by simply “abiding.” What does this mean? How do you abide in Jesus?
Let’s illustrate it this way: When you put a tea bag in a cup of hot water, something happens. As the tea bag abides in the water, the tea begins to flavour the water until it takes on the taste of the tea bag. And the longer the tea bag abides in the water, the stronger the color and flavour of the tea.
That’s what happens when you abide in Christ and He abides in you. The longer you abide in Him and the deeper you go with Him, the more His presence will begin to permeate your life. The branch doesn’t produce the fruit; it bears the fruit. It’s the vine that produces the fruit.
And Jesus said, “I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing” (v. 5 NKJV). Without the vine, the strongest branch is as defenseless as the weakest branch. So what does it mean to abide in Christ?
(1) Studying His Word. “If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you” (v. 7 NKJV). As you study God’s Word, you are changed by His Spirit.
(2) Obeying His will. “If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love” (v. 10 NKJV). The closer you get to God, the more you’ll want to do what He says. And when you do what He says, you’ll begin to walk in His blessing.
Soul food: Jer 33:1-36:26; Luke 4:14-30; Ps 102:1-11; Prov 14:35-15:2
2021-07-01
John 15:4 NIV
Jesus said: “My Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch…that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me….If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit” (vv.1-5 NIV).
What does God want from you today? Spiritual fruit! And He will do two things to produce it in your life. First, He will show you the habits, relationships, and activities that make it impossible for you to bear spiritual fruit, and then begin to cut them off. But He can only do that if you let Him. Second, He will reveal to you the things that drain you spiritually and keep you from bearing more fruit. And His favourite pruning knife is His Word, which is “sharper than any double-edged sword” (Hebrews 4:12 NIV).
As you read God’s Word, He cuts away the bad so that it doesn’t impede the good. Then He prunes the good so that it doesn’t obstruct the best. This explains why He allows difficult times to come into our lives. As one pastor puts it: “Trials may simply be pruning shears in the hands of the divine Gardener – tools He uses to cut away dead wood, fruitless branches, and sap-sucking shoots so that we might bear more fruit.”
Soul food: Jer 31-32; Luke 4:1-13; Ps 98; Prov 14:34
2021-06-30
Ecclesiastes 9:9 CEV
The story is told of a woman who accompanied her husband to the doctor. After his checkup the doctor called her into his office alone and said, “Your husband is suffering from a severe disease combined with horrible stress, and unless you do these things, he will die. Each morning fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant throughout the day, and make sure he’s in a good mood. Make him something nutritious for lunch, and at dinnertime prepare him an especially nice meal. Don’t burden him with household chores; he’s probably had a hard day. And don’t discuss your problems with him; it will only increase his stress. In other words, try to satisfy his every whim. Do this for ten months, and I think he’ll make a complete recovery.” On the way home in the car her husband asked, “So what did the doctor say?” Looking him squarely in the eyes, she replied, “You’re going to die!”
Seriously, when you reach the end of your life and look back, the two questions that will matter most are these: (1) Have you discovered God’s will, and done your best to fulfill it? (2) Have you loved your spouse and your family, and given them the time and attention they deserve?
Solomon writes: “God decided long ago…this is what you should do. Dress up, comb your hair, and look your best. Life is short, and you love your wife, so enjoy being with her. This is what you are supposed to do as you struggle through life on…earth” (vv. 7-9 CEV). So the word for you today is – take care of each other.
Soul food: Jer 28-30; Luke 3:21-38; Ps 95; Prov 14:29-33
