2020-08-21
Luke 17:3 NCV
Sometimes we need to confront people if their behaviour is negatively affecting us. Jesus said, ‘If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them.’ But that doesn’t give us the right to vent our anger or jump in straight away without thinking. Jesus also said, ‘Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying “I repent,” you must forgive them’ (v. 4 NCV). If we do confront someone, we also need to respect their choice if they decide not to continue their relationship with us. Their rejection of our friendship doesn’t mean we’re less important or inferior in some way. However, if we find we’re often being rejected and we don’t know why, it might be a good idea to try to find the reason by asking someone we trust to give their honest opinion of our own behaviour. The Bible says: ‘Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy’ (Proverbs 27:6 NLT). It’s hard to listen to criticism, but it can be the first step towards improving ourselves. We should try not to be defensive or offended by what they say. A true friend will want us to be the best we can be, so even if the things they say are difficult to hear, we can know that their words come from a heart that wants to help us grow. It’s also important that we take what they’ve said to God and ask Him for wisdom to know how to deal with their feedback, and what changes we might need to make. By being willing and open to change, we can turn rejection into something positive that helps us grow.
Judg 9:34-11:40; Luke 16:1-18; Ps 119:113-120; Prov 20:25; Ecc 5:4-6
Luke 17:3 NKJV
Sometimes you are called upon to confront behavior that negatively affects you. Jesus said, “If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him.” Now, that doesn’t give you the right to vent your anger or charge in like a bull in a china shop. Jesus also said, “And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him” (v. 4 NKJV). And here’s another thought: Respect the other person’s decision not to pursue a relationship with you. They may not belong in your life, and you may not belong in theirs. Think about the last time you went shopping. Did you purchase every single item you examined? Of course not. Did you reject them because they were inferior? Surely not. You simply decided they were not for you. Of course, if you experience a pattern of rejection and you’re baffled about the cause, you may want to consider finding out why. “Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful” (Proverbs 27:6 KJV). Sometimes it’s wise to ask, “I’d like to get some feedback from you for my personal development. My objective here is not to resume our relationship. I would just like to ask what it was that made you decide to terminate it. I’d really appreciate your honest feedback.” Be sure to project an upbeat attitude, not a negative one. Listen objectively, and don’t be defensive. You are gathering information. And be willing to change if there is merit to what they say.
Soul food: Judg 9:34-11:40; Luke 16:1-18; Ps 119:113-120; Prov 20:25; Ecc 5:4-6
Lukas 17:3 NLV
Soms word daar van jou verwag om gedrag wat jou negatief affekteer, te konfronteer. Jesus het gesê: ‘…As jou broer aanhou sonde doen, wys hom tereg, en as hy tot inkeer kom, vergewe hom.’ Dit gee jou egter nie die reg om soos ‘n woedende bul tekere te gaan nie. Jesus het ook gesê: ‘Ook as hy sewe keer op ‘n dag teenoor jou oortree, maar ook sewe keer na jou toe kom en sê: ‘Ek is jammer,’ moet jy hom vergewe’ (vers 4 NLV). Hier is nog ‘n gedagte: Respekteer die ander persoon se besluit om nie ‘n verhouding met jou aan te knoop nie. Hulle mag dalk nie in jou lewe hoort nie en andersom. Dink aan die laaste keer wat jy inkopies gaan doen het. Het jy elke liewe item waarna jy gekyk het gekoop? Natuurlik nie. Het jy hulle verwerp omdat hulle minderwaardig was? Sekerlik ook nie. Jy het eenvoudig besluit dat dit nie vir jou is nie. As jy egter ‘n patroon van verwerping ervaar en nie seker is wat die oorsaak daarvan is nie, moet jy dit dalk oorweeg om uit te vind hoekom. ‘Die wonde van iemand wat lief is vir jou is baie beter as die baie soene wat jou vyande jou wil gee’ (Spreuke 27:6 NLV). Soms is dit wys om te vra: ‘Ek wil graag terugvoer van jou vir my persoonlike ontwikkeling hê. My motivering is nie om ons verhouding te hervat nie. Ek wil net graag weet wat jou laat besluit het om dit te termineer. Ek sal jou eerlike terugvoer waardeer.’ Maak seker dat jy ‘n optimistiese houding, in plaas van ‘n negatiewe een, projekteer. Luister objektief en moenie verdedigend wees nie. Jy samel inligting in. Jy moet ook gewillig wees om te verander as daar waarheid in hulle antwoord steek.
Sielskos: Rig 9:34-11:40; Luk 16:1-18; Ps 119:113-120; Spr 20:25; Pred 5:4-6
2020-08-20
Spreuke 31:18 ABA
Die foute wat jy al gemaak het mag dalk erg, groot en herhaaldelik gewees het. Hulle het egter nie God se dunk van jou verander nie. ‘…Ek het jou lief met ‘n liefde wat nooit ophou nie. Ek trek jou met troue liefde na My toe. Ek sal jou weer herbou soos jy vroeër was…’ (Jeremia 31:3-4 NLV). Ja, God sal jou korrigeer wanneer jy dit nodig het. Sy korreksie is egter nie verwerping nie – dis ‘n bewys van sy liefde. ‘Die Here dissiplineer juis die mense vir wie Hy lief is…’ (Hebreërs 12:6 NLV). God se doel met dissipline is om jou tot jou hoogste potensiaal te ontwikkel. Moet dus nie toelaat dat enigiemand jou minderwaardig laat voel nie. Wees jou oorspronklike self wanneer jy by ander mense is. Fokus op dit wat jy het om te gee, eerder as hoe ander mense jou sien. Moenie spog of groot name in die gesprek laat val om die speelveld gelyk te probeer maak nie. Jy is alreeds op dieselfde vlak – selfs al het jy nie ‘n soortgelyke opvoeding, ervaring, finansiële status, sosiale stand of agtergrond nie. Van wanneer af het sulke dinge mense beter as ander gemaak – veral in jou hemelse Vader se oë? Salomo beskryf die kwaliteite van ‘n uitnemende vrou: ‘Wanneer sy sien dat mense graag haar goed koop, dan werk sy die hele nag.’ Hierdie vrou was nie hoogmoedig omdat mense haar goed wou koop nie, sy het net vertroue gehad in haar Godgegewe opdrag en wie God haar gemaak het om te wees. Haar selfvertroue het van binne af gekom. Salomo eindig die hoofstuk met hierdie woorde: ‘Gee vir haar die waardering wat sy verdien. Laat sy erkenning geniet in die stadspoort’ (Spreuke 31:31 NLV).
Sielskos: Rig 7:1-9:33; Luk 15:11-32; Ps 119:105-112; Spr 18:10-12
Proverbs 31:18 NKJV
The mistakes you have made may be big, bad, and oft repeated. But they haven’t changed God’s mind about you. “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. I will build you up again, and you…will be rebuilt” (Jeremiah 31:3-4 NIV). Yes, God will correct you when you need it. But His correction is not rejection – it’s proof of His love. “The Lord disciplines the one he loves” (Hebrews 12:6 NIV). God’s purpose in discipline is to develop you to your highest potential. So don’t let anyone put you down. Be your authentic self when you’re with others. Focus on what you have to give, rather than on how others perceive you. Don’t put on airs, brag, or name-drop in an attempt to level the playing field. You are already equal – even if you don’t have a similar education, experience, financial status, social standing, or background. Since when did such things make anybody inherently superior to another – especially in the eyes of your heavenly Father? If your goal in life is to please everyone and have them speak well of you, your self-worth will always be at their mercy. Solomon describes the qualities of a virtuous woman. Here’s one of them: “She perceives that her merchandise is good.” This woman wasn’t prideful, she was just confident in who God had made her to be and the assignment He had given her to fulfill. Her confidence came from within, not from without. Solomon ends the chapter in these words: “Honour her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise” (Proverbs 31:31 NIV).
Soul food: Judg 7:1-9:33; Luke 15:11-32; Ps 119:105-112; Prov 18:10-12
