2020-02-04
Ecclesiastes 9:9 NKJV
Three things happen in a good marriage: (1) You get to know yourself. To grow, you must be able to look at yourself realistically, and the best place to do that is in a home filled with love. It lets you be open about your mistakes and shortcomings. It’s a safe place to fail. It creates a listening environment filled with understanding and support. The people closest to us form us. When Mother Teresa received the Nobel Peace Prize, she was asked, “What can we do to promote world peace?” She replied, “Go home and love your family.” If you want to change your world, start at home. (2) You get to know your character. A Christ-centered home not only helps form your children’s character, it strengthens yours too. Character is built on the choices you make and habits you cultivate. And since your family creates your primary environment, it influences those choices and habits. Strong families encourage us to make good choices, develop the right disciplines, and pay the price today for success tomorrow. (3) You have a safe haven. It seems like the pace of life gets more hectic every day. Driving on overcrowded roads is stressful. The workplace is demanding. The schoolyard is an increasingly hostile environment. Where can you find shelter? If not at home, then probably nowhere. Theodore Roosevelt said, “I’d rather spend time with my family than with any of the world’s notables.” His home was his safe haven in the midst of life’s storms – and yours can be too. The question is: What are you doing to make it that way?
Soul food: Isa 38-41; Matt 12:15-21; Ps 111; Prov 3:29-30
1 Corinthians 13:4 NIV
In yesterday’s reading, we looked at how we can grow our relationships. The second place we can find growth in relationships is in ourselves. Relationships help us to get to know ourselves better. Even when we’re committed to being a good friend, family member, or partner, we’ll still have days when we struggle with the relationship. People will frustrate us. People will make mistakes. But the tough times in relationships can grow us. It’s in those times when we learn how we respond to frustrations. Do we communicate well or do we give people the silent treatment? Are we quick to forgive or do we hold on to bitterness and resentment? In order for us to grow, we have to be able to evaluate ourselves honestly, and our relationships with other people provide good opportunities for us to do this. The people closest to us help to shape our beliefs, character, and faith. They influence our choices and habits. In 1 Corinthians 13, we find a list of the characteristics of love. It’s a useful checklist for our character in our relationships. It says: ‘Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails’ (1 Corinthians 13:4-8 NIVUK). If we want to grow through our relationships, we need to evaluate where we’re at, what we need to improve on, and then put the work in to grow in those areas.
Isa 38-41; Matt 12:15-21; Ps 111; Prov 3:29-30
Prediker 9:9 NLV
Drie dinge gebeur in ‘n goeie huwelik: 1) Jy leer jouself ken. Om te groei, moet jy in staat wees om realisties na jouself te kyk en die beste plek om dit te doen, is in ‘n huis gevul met liefde. Dit laat jou toe om eerlik oor jou foute en jou tekortkominge te wees. Dis ‘n veilige plek om te faal. Dit skep ‘n omgewing gevul met begrip en ondersteuning. Die mense die naaste aan ons, vorm ons. Toe Moeder Teresa die Nobelprys vir vrede gewen het, is sy gevra: ‘Wat kan ons doen om wêreldvrede te bevorder?’ Sy het geantwoord: ‘Gaan huis toe en wees lief vir jou familie.’ As jy die wêreld wil verander, moet jy by die huis begin. 2) Jy begin jou karakter ken. ‘n Huis wat om Christus gesentreerd is, help nie net om jou kinders se karakters te vorm nie, maar dit versterk ook joune. Karakter word op die keuses wat jy maak en die gewoontes wat jy kweek, gebou. Omdat jou familie jou primêre omgewing skep, beïnvloed dit daardie keuses en gewoontes. Sterk families moedig ons aan om goeie keuses te maak en die regte dissiplines te ontwikkel. 3) Jy het ‘n veilige hawe. Dit voel of die pas van die lewe daagliks hewiger raak. Om op oorvol paaie te bestuur is stresvol. Die werkplek is veeleisend. Die skoolterrein is ‘n toenemend vyandige omgewing. Waar kan jy skuiling vind? Theodore Roosevelt het gesê: ‘Ek sal eerder met my familie tyd spandeer as met enige van die wêreld se belangrikes.’ Sy huis was ‘n veilige hawe te midde van die lewe se storms – en joune kan ook wees. Die vraag is: Wat doen jy om dit so te maak?
Sielskos: Jes 38-41; Matt 12:15-21; Ps 111; Spr 3:29-30
2020-02-03
Ephesians 4:2 NIV
We all have a number of different types of relationships in our lives. There are the relationships we have with our family, our friends, our partners, and our colleagues. All of our relationships can lead to growth, if we’re open and committed. Firstly, our relationships themselves can be grown when we put the effort in. We have to spend time with people for a relationship to develop. We need to really listen to what the other person has to say, and remember details about them. It’s through this time and conversation that we can begin to understand the other person better, allowing us to grow closer to them and know how to show them love. It can be easy to take people for granted. We need to learn how other people feel loved and appreciated, and then act in that way towards them. It’s also important to treat the other person with respect, in the way that we would want to be treated. The Bible says: ‘Do to others as you would have them do to you’ (Luke 6:31 NIV), which is a great rule for us to live by if we want our relationships to grow. The Bible also says: ‘Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.’ If we don’t exercise humility, patience, and love in our relationships, we’ll find that they begin to fall apart rather than grow. Finally, communication is necessary to maintain and grow any relationship. We need to remember that people can’t read our minds, so we’ll often have to tell them if we need something or if we’re upset by something. So if we want our relationships to last, we need to commit ourselves to growing them.
Isa 34-37; Matt 12:1-14; Ps 107:33-43; Prov 3:27-28
Proverbs 18:22 NKJV
If you’re over sixty, chances are you grew up in an era where you didn’t know too many divorced couples and the subject was taboo. Now your children are growing up in a world where marriages fail every day. If you don’t want yours to be one of them: (1) Learn to show your love. Psychologist William James says, “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.” And if we don’t feel appreciated at home, there’s a good chance we won’t feel appreciated at all, because generally speaking, the world doesn’t fulfill that desire. The best thing you can do for your spouse and your children is appreciate them and love them – not based on their performance, but simply because they’re yours. (2) Pay attention. The Reverend Theodore Hesburgh, President Emeritus of the University of Notre Dame, said, “The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” And that works both ways. A successful marriage is one that can go from crisis to crisis and keep getting stronger. Commitment, not emotion, is what carries you through. If you only intend to stay married as long as you feel like you’re in love, you might as well quit now. Like anything worthwhile, a good marriage requires constant attention. (3) Protect your time together. If you feel like you ought to be at work when you’re with your family and vice versa, something’s wrong. Call a family conference and agree on how much time you should spend together. If you prioritize and protect those times, your marriage will thrive.
Soul food: Isa 34-37; Matt 12:1-14; Ps 107:33-43; Prov 3:27-28
