2023-01-26
Spreuke 18:13 NLV
Iemand het gesê: ‘Om te trou is soos om iets te koop wat jy al vir jare in die winkelvenster bewonder. Jy is mal daaroor – maar wanneer jy by die huis kom, pas dit nie by alles nie!’ Die Bybel sê: ‘Mag God… julle help om in volkome harmonie met mekaar te lewe…’ (Romeine 15:5 NLV). Dit beteken dat jy die volgende drie dinge moet doen om ‘n gelukkige huwelik te bou:
1) Hê ‘n oop gemoed. Die Bybel sê: ‘Iemand wat ‘n antwoord gee voor hy die vraag gehoor het, is dwaas. Skande wag vir hom.’ Moet dus nie jou antwoord formuleer terwyl jou man of vrou nog praat nie. Om te luister, beteken dat jy jouself tot die gesprek verbind en die ander persoon se standpunt erken. ‘Moet niks uit selfsug doen of om daarmee te spog nie. Wees eerder nederig deur van medegelowiges meer te dink as van jouself. Julle moenie net elkeen na sy eie belange omsien nie, maar ook na mekaar se belange’ (Filippense 2:3-4 NLV).
2) Leer om vir jouself te lag. ‘Blydskap laat ‘n mens se gesig straal. Hartseer maak ‘n mens terneergedruk’ (Spreuke 15:13 NLV). Wanneer jy finansiële druk, familieprobleme, siekte of net gewone uitputting ervaar, kan humor die spanning verlig en jou perspektief help herstel.
3) Vee die ‘E’ woord uit jou woordeskat uit. Alhoewel God egskeiding onder sekere omstandighede toelaat, is dit nooit sy ideaal nie. Soos een paartjie wat deur hulle huweliksprobleme gewerk het, gesê het: ‘Ons is bly dat ons nie gedurende die moeilike jare tou opgegooi het nie. Ons het lank genoeg uitgehou om te besef dat dit met tyd regtig beter kan begin gaan.’
Wanneer jy jouself daaraan toewy om aan jou verhoudig te werk, maak nie saak hoe dinge uitwerk nie, sal jy nooit oor jou pogings spyt wees nie.
Sielskos: Gen 4-6; Luk 6:1-16; Ps 104:1-23; Spr 3:9-10
Proverbs 18:13 NLT
Someone said “getting married is like buying something you have admired for ages in a shop window. You love it – but when you get it home, it doesn’t always go with everything!” The Bible gives us three words that are essential to building a happy marriage: “Live in… harmony” (Romans 15:5 NLT). That means doing these three things:
(1) Keep an open mind. The Bible says, “Spouting off before listening to the facts is… shameful and foolish.” So don’t form your response while your husband or wife is still talking. And never become so entrenched in your position that you’re unwilling to consider your spouse’s viewpoint. Listening is about connecting and acknowledging where the other person is coming from. “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests… take an interest in others” (Philippians 2:3-4 NLT).
(2) Learn to laugh at yourself. “A cheerful heart brings a smile… a sad heart makes it hard to get through the day” (Proverbs 15:13 MSG). When you’re experiencing money woes, family problems, illness, or plain old exhaustion, humor can ease the tension and help restore your perspective.
(3) Eliminate the “D” word from your vocabulary. Although God permits divorce under certain circumstances, it’s never His ideal. Like one couple who worked through their marriage troubles said, “We’re glad we didn’t give up during the difficult years. We hung in long enough to realise that it really can get better with time.” When you commit to work on your relationship, no matter how things ultimately end up, you will never regret your efforts.
Soul food: Gen 4-6; Luke 6:1-16; Ps 104:1-23; Prov 3:9-10
2023-01-25
Amos 3:3 NLV
Daar is geen toets wat kan voorspel hoe ‘n romantiese afspraak uiteindelik sal uitdraai nie, maar hier is vyf vrae wat jy altyd jouself moet afvra: 1) Wat is my eerste indruk van hierdie persoon? Byvoorbeeld, met wie hang hulle uit? Watter tipe geleenthede geniet hulle? Lieg hulle? Steel? Vloek? Gebruik hulle dwelms? Dis die tipe inligting wat jou ongekende hartseer in die toekoms kan spaar. Jy moenie mense op hulle baadjie takseer nie, maar totdat jy regtig iemand leer ken, is dit die inligting wat jy tot jou beskikking het.
2) Hoe goed ken ek hulle? Is dit nie wyser om met iemand wat jy al ‘n rukkie ken, in plaas van ‘n vreemdeling, ‘n verhouding aan te knoop nie?
3) Betoon hulle genade teenoor ander mense? Daar is niks erger as ‘n man wat met sy vorige verowerings spog, of ‘n vrou wat gedurig haar eks kritiseer nie. Sal jy so ‘n soort persoon met jou reputasie en jou hart vertrou?
4) Deel ons dieselfde waardes? Die Bybel sê: ‘Sal twee mense saam op reis gaan sonder om eers af te spreek om dit te doen?’ Jy moet weet dat jou moontlike maat ‘n toegewyde Christen is wat volgens sy of haar beginsels leef. Watter tipe standaarde het hulle oor dinge soos geld, sedes en rolprente?
5) Kan ek hulle vertrou om hulle woord te hou? Was hulle lojaal in vorige verhoudings, of het hulle geflankeer of hul maat verkul? Iemand wat hulle woord verbreek, word uiteindelik ook iemand wat harte breek.
Hier is goeie raad wanneer jy ‘n verhouding wil aanknoop: ‘Vra na die wil van God in alles wat jy doen. Hy sal die regte pad vir jou wys’ (Spreuke 3:6 NLV).
Sielskos: Gen 1-3; Luk 5:27-39; Ps 100; Spr 3:7-8
Amos 3:3 NLT
There is no definitive test that can predict how a date will ultimately work out, but here are five questions you should always ask yourself:
(1) What’s my first impression of this person? For example, who do they hang out with? What kind of events do they enjoy? Do they lie? Steal? Swear? Do drugs? This kind of information can save you untold heartache down the road. And, not to judge a book by its cover, until you really get to know somebody, what else can you go by?
(2) How well do I know them? Isn’t it wiser to date someone you have known for a while instead of a stranger?
(3) Are they gracious toward others? Nothing is worse than a man who brags about his previous conquests, or a woman who constantly criticizes her ex. Would you trust that kind of person with your reputation and your heart?
(4) Do we share the same values? The Bible says, “Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction?” Opposites may attract, but that’s not a good rule when it comes to values. You need to know that your date is a committed Christian who lives by his or her convictions. What kind of standards do they have about things like money, morals, and movies?
(5) Can I trust them to keep their word? In previous relationships did they flirt, or cheat, or remain loyal? Count on it, a promise breaker will inevitably become a heartbreaker.
If you’re dating, here is some sound advice: “Seek [God’s] will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take” (Proverbs 3:6 NLT).
Soul food: Gen 1-3; Luke 5:27-39; Ps 100; Prov 3:7-8
2023-01-24
1 Thessalonians 3:12 NIV
One of America’s most successful telephone companies created a TV commercial using the slogan, “Can you hear me now?” It shows a man talking on the phone, but the person on the other end can’t hear him. So, he repeatedly asks, “Can you hear me now?” The ad was designed to convey the message that this particular phone company delivers a high-quality signal and doesn’t drop calls. When your phone drops a call, you know it. And what’s your immediate reaction? Annoyance? Frustration? Anger?
In Everyone Communicates, Few Connect, Dr. John Maxwell writes: “When I interact with people… I know I’ve connected when I sense extra effort – people go the extra mile; unsolicited appreciation – they say positive things; unguarded openness – they demonstrate trust; increased communication – they express themselves more readily; enjoyable experiences – they feel good about what they’re doing; emotional bondedness – they display a connection on an emotional level; positive energy – their emotional ‘batteries’ are charged by being together;… unconditional love – they are accepting without reservation.
Anytime I interact with people and I see evidence of these signals, I know I’m connecting. I’ve learned what it takes to connect… and… to gauge when I’m succeeding. How are you doing when it comes to connecting? When you interact one-on-one with someone important in your life, do you receive these signals?… Even if connecting with others isn’t something you’re good at today, you can learn how to do it and become better tomorrow.” But first, you must genuinely care about the person you are trying to connect with. That’s why Paul writes, “May the Lord make your love increase and overflow.”
Soul food: Ecc 9-12; Luke 5:12-26; Ps 96; Prov 3:5-6
