Confrontation

2017-03-31
2 Samuel 12:7 NKJV

“Can you imagine the courage and integrity it took for Nathan the prophet to
challenge King David about his affair with Bathsheba? Most of us tend to avoid
confrontation because we fear being disliked and rejected. But when you avoid
confrontation it often makes things worse. By hiding his sin, David was depriving
himself of God’s blessing. Looking back, he wrote, ‘If I had cherished sin in my heart,
the Lord would not have listened; but God has surely listened and has heard my
prayer’ (Psalm 66:18-19 NIV). Confrontation isn’t always the right response, but
when it is we need to be doing it in a positive way. Here are ten guidelines to help:
1) Do it ASAP. 2) Address the wrong action, not the person. 3) Only focus on what
the person can change. 4) Give them the benefit of the doubt. 5) Be specific. 6)
Avoid sarcasm. 7) Avoid saying ‘you always’ and ‘you never’ because they’re not true.
8) When it’s appropriate, tell them how we feel about what was done wrong. 9) Give
them a plan to fix the problem. 10) Affirm him or her as a person and as a friend. The
Bible says, ‘The Lord corrects those he loves’ (Proverbs 3:12 NCV). So in the same way
that God corrects us out of love, we need to make sure that when we’re confronting
someone we’re doing it from a place of love too. Confrontation is an opportunity to
help that person move closer to God, and to develop your relationship with them –
but let’s make sure we’re doing it respectfully and with their best interests at heart.”